davidchecker said:
Great production values, decent pacing and acting, cinematography. Would've like to see more face shots, it's where you really see the terror! As a writer, though, I really have to say the script wasn't making it for me. I know the genre doesn't really demand it, but I think at least taking out some of the more expositional dialogue would've tightened it up.
Thanks for the compliments. As for your comments on the script, I can see where you are comng from. I made a decision from the time I had the concept that I wanted a very minimal amount of dialogue, with a strong emphasis on visuals. As a result, I believe you could be correct, the dialogue may have turned out a bit 2-D.
mrde50 said:
I must admit... Static freaked me out. This was a great concept and very well done.
If it were me in that house and I saw blood all over the walls like that, I would have dove out the window like Superman. Once I hit the ground, I would have ran so fast it would take three days for the sound to catch up to me
You're suicidal! A two story fall into the darkness? Ouch! The way I see it, the demon-cloak man would catch me quicker with two shattered legs!
Poke said:
I thought the pacing was a bit slow. I can imagine this same concept being pulled of in less than five minutes, easily. There seemed to be a lot of walking around at the beginning, and even in the middle Spoiler: after the guy disappears. To me this has the ability to kill your audience (no pun intended). There was more than one point where I desperately wanted to just fast forward to the end.
The concept - two guys have the misfortune to end up in a haunted house - is not an unfamiliar one. I liked the twist of having Spoiler: the guy see things through the TV set, and the ghost man being on the set but not visible in the room was well done (save for the guy either yelling "no" or "Joe" too many times). But it felt like nothing more than something added for the sake of "coolness." I know it's a short, and backstory for a TV set is a tricky thing to handle, but it could have been brilliant if Spoiler: the TV set had some reason for trying to spoil the bad ghost man's plans - like say it's inhabited by the ghost man's first kill, and it is trying to warn people.
There was some goos lighting and camera work, but in the end the short fell flat for me.
Ok, I see what you're saying here. With regard to the pacing, you aren't the first one to thing it was a bit slow. I knew I wanted to make this film have a very deliberate pace, which some have felt it slow.
I will say this, watching on a computer screen doesn't help that perception. When played in the theater, I recieved no negative feedback about pacing. I;m not saying you would change your mind, just that the nature of the medium tends to encourage the feeling you had.
Thank you for your compliments on the TV room (which gave me many headaches in the storyboard phase! I really appreciate the thorough feedback, but we'll agree to disagree on some points! (if we didn't, we'd all be making the same movie wouldn't we?)
Thanks again for the comments guys, they really help!