main character takes some mystery drug, reacts badly, sees/experiences some sort of attack, and runs off. correct?
1) too long. this sets me up for like a 15 minute short, and thats generally pretty long. to me, the best shorts are 11 min or less.
2) i have no info or reason to care about what is happening. why is he taking this drug? is he depressed over an ex-girl (cliche)? peer pressure? why should i care about this character? that should be conveyed from shot 1. i also have no info on the drug, why does he react poorly? does the drug have some sort of bad reputation? show me that somehow? and if so, why is he taking it? he must be really depressed? or? show me the emotion and driving force behind this character
3) color and pacing. cutting and color changing is distracting and doesn't flow well. it reveals a lot of grain in your footage when you change the color so drastically and thats the most distracting
4) why is he running off? what happens next? i need some clue or reason to continue watching. set that up for the viewer.
5) audio needs work, do your research, or better yet, find someone who knows what they're doing to help you with that. building tension and suspense here will lie almost entirely in audio (not cutting and color!), so know what you're doing and why
6) title animation drags long. let the letters scan briefly, then get to the title, i felt like that dragged very long
hope this isn't too harsh and helps in some way. also, it can be difficult to make any helpful points without knowing much at all about this project...what is the story, why are you making it, how long is it supposed to be, etc, etc.
best of luck finishing this up!