Giving an end to this idea?

Semiazas

Semiazas

I've had an idea for a short, it involves two characters, either can be any gender.
The idea is that one of them wakes up in a room with no idea how they got there and where they are.
The second character is angel who needs to explain that the other character is dead.
I had the idea of the dead character going from denial to anger and possibly having him/her accept his fate at the end of it and it fades to black with him and the angel just joining hands.
Thoughts on the idea? :)
 
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Since this is a short film storyline, try to focus on something very specific. Make the interaction be about something very personal. The story itself sounds very reasonable, but it does call to mind several other movies that deal with the afterlife, denial of death, help from a guiding angel/figure, etc. As it stands, the idea isn't overly original -- that's why you need to give it some personal angle that sets it apart from the general storyline. Add something to this to create intrigue, like why the person is dead, or is the angel someone he/she knows to be dead?
 
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John@Bophe said:
Since this is a short film storyline, try to focus on something very specific. Make the interaction be about something very personal. The story itself sounds very reasonable, but it does call to mind several other movies that deal with the afterlife, denial of death, help from a guiding angel/figure, etc. As it stands, the idea isn't overly original -- that's why you need to give it some personal angle that sets it apart from the general storyline. Add something to this to create intrigue, like why the person is dead, or is the angel someone he/she knows to be dead?
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The idea for the concept of angels etc came from the German movie Wings of Desire, which has angels intervening on Earth.
I'm aware it's not an original idea, I'm trying to think of a way to make it more interesting but... As of now I have nothing unfortunately. I'm open to suggestions :)
 
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George Clayton Johnson did this with a Twilight Zone episode called "Nothing In The Dark." I love this kind of story. Like John suggested, try to find a hook that makes it unique. What Johnson did was make the audience think one guy, a mean sort of dude, was going to be Death. In reality, though, Death ended up being a real fresh-faced and pretty young man (played by a young Robert Redford).

Perhaps your angel will show your recently deceased a moment from his life that is unique to your story, and use it to explain how he has touched someone left behind and thus can safely move on.

Good luck; let us know how it progresses!
 
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Are you planning to shoot this movie yourself, or just write the script? That may impact how your story progresses. For example, if you are shooting it yourself, who are the two best actors you know? Male? Female? Young? Old? What locations do you have access to that would make a good setting for this scene? A bedroom? A basement? A motel room? These are all variables that can drive how the story comes together.
 
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John@Bophe said:
Are you planning to shoot this movie yourself, or just write the script? That may impact how your story progresses. For example, if you are shooting it yourself, who are the two best actors you know? Male? Female? Young? Old? What locations do you have access to that would make a good setting for this scene? A bedroom? A basement? A motel room? These are all variables that can drive how the story comes together.
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Hoping to shoot it myself.
I know some good actors from my drama class, they're my age (16 to 18) so that'll need to tie into the story somehow of course. Just need to think of a realistic to kill off a teenage character. Or more a cause of death.
 
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Okay...person wakes up after a wild party; finds a strange person in the room. S/He assumes it is another party guest, but eventually finds out it is an angel sent to break the news that s/he is dead from an alcohol/drug overdose.

How would THAT conversation go?
 
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I certainly like the overdose idea. I had the idea of the dead character going from denying it, trying to convince himself he's dreaming etc (but then I'd need some kinda bombshell to show him he's dead... Maybe... Something to do with the drugs?) and then he kind of explodes in fury at the angel for being dead and eventually, the angel manages to help him accept his fate (perhaps they kiss, I don't know) and then the film fades to black.
Probably won't be longer than a few minutes.
 
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The angel can be an unknown victim of the recently departed.. say, the dead guy was drunk driving, sure he crashed and killed him self, but on the way killed a pretty girl and she is the angel... the inner struggle is for him to forgive himself as she has already forgiven him..
 
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I have an alternative to propose based on slightly different premises. It has more conflict and an ending.

The guy is not dead but near death. He’s a drug dealer in his high-school and he ODed on his own stuff. The angel is not next to him but in another room watching him and so is the devil. They are competing for the guy. The angel wants to give him a 2nd chance and send him back, the devil wants to take him to hell.

To decide the contest they play a little game. The guy is told he’s in some rehab clinic. He’s visited by his girlfriend. But she’s not his GF but an image of her controlled alternatively by the angel and the devil. Angel GF tries to bring out the best in him. He feels hopeful, thinks he can give up drugs and drug dealing. Evil GF brings out the worst in him. He’s angry, frustrated, feels like a pathetic loser. The angel and the devil observe the proceedings from a 2-way mirror, bantering, jesting, commenting on each other’s work. The rule of the game is that neither of them can reveal to the guy that he’s being tested.

We can have a twist at 3/4. The angel has been steadily gaining ground but at 3/4 the devil manages to turn things around by making the GF do or say something deeply hurtful to the guy.

The whole time, the guy doesn’t quite buy that he’s in a special rehab clinic. Something feels wrong. He tries to uncover the truth and progressively gets some hints along the way.

It ends like this. The guy is so infuriated that he’s at the girl’s throat trying to wring her neck. She’s laughing and gives him some last hints. And, at the same moment as he finishes her, he finally gets it and knows he has just signed his own death warrant.
 
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