I thought it was pretty cool. I liked the lighting (except for the detective scene in which I felt the detective should have been lit as well), I thought some of the shots were really nice (ie. dolly into the reverse of the main character looking at the hanging pages), and I'm a geek for time travel stuff....
I wasn't sure what the ending meant. Were they not married? I thought they were. He was time traveling not to save his wife's life, but to make a girl he liked in High School love him? I thought the detective said he couldn't remember his wife dying...
I'm a bit confused.
I thought instead of the guy picking the camera up and shooting himself handheld, he should have had a tripod set up...maybe you already thought of this, and liked the handheld better...I don't know.
I liked the retrofit props you had...they looked handcrafted but appropriately make-shift and scientific. Creative.
I wasn't a fan of the accent the detective put on...I hope that wasn't real...it didn't seem real, and it was a bit distracting to the story and important plot elements.
The lead actor had a great look, and did a good job with the character.
I wouldn't have placed the flashlight so close to the paper when the guard walked in...I know most of the audience won't notice that...but it didn't work for me. For the page to be lit like that, the guard would have had to be holding the page...
The shot in the end where the camera pulls through the back of the pages...it was obvious that the camera moved through the pages...one of the pages bent up with the camera, and sort of hung there in frame a bit. That was distracting.
Anyway...I'm being super picky. But that's just how I roll with critiques. It was a cool short. Good job.
Thanks! Yeah I feel pretty happy overall about the lighting. The detective not being very lit was my overall decision because the class this was made for (directing the narrative) was all about shot design and character. Therefore from what I took from the class, I decided to light up the main character more to make it his scene in the end.
They were never married but I can see where it can be confusing. I know that for this specific assignment I was supposed to make a very clear story but our professor told us to pick one idea and go with it at the beginning of our film and I chose "to make people think". Basically, throughout the movie the audience should see the main character as trying to save the girl he loves or maybe he has lost her and wants to see her again or whatever theories they have. The last shot is meant to show that he has never actually been with this girl but is psychotically obsessed with her. He has tried several times to make her love him and none of the attempts have worked, but he isn't going to stop.
Originally I had the main character record a video diary from his computer. Then I changed the idea to a tripod setup. In the end I chose the handheld, I think it could have worked any way but I just liked the handheld in the end as I was trying to make it show that he is completely alone and everything he does, he has to do for himself.
Thanks for the comment about the props. I know they weren't anything great but I really tried to do my best with what money I had (...student film : / )
To be honest I didn't like the accent of the detective at all. It actually was his real accent and I tried my best to have him take away his southern twang to make the story not as distracting but alas with student film actors, he wasn't the best and in the end that was too complicated for both of us so I went along with his natural accent.
I agree, I think the lead actor did a really great job. What I loved was that he worked on the film completely for free and drove 5 hours to set...all he requested was a hotel room for the shoot dates! It was nice for a change to have someone that is really passionate not only about acting but about furthering student education.
Actually, the flashlight was placed exactly where the guard was standing. I know I should have pulled back the flashlight but I really just wanted to light up that paper pretty well and that was the second to last shot which we were crunched on time for so I went with it.
I'm pretty happy with the last shot of the film. I know it's obvious that a camera is moving through the papers and we took about 5 takes of that shot....though that was the best even with the paper hanging at the top right....I still think it gets the point across and probably with a little more time I would have planned out that shot differently.
Thanks for all the comments and I really appreciate the criticism, it's sometimes hard to get that. I'm really glad you enjoyed it!
