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Thanks, mate!

I'm impressed with your eye for detail!

Also, you've build your characters well. (All of them have "A Limp and an Eyepatch"- Blake Snyder)

It's like Melvin Udall gone totally mad :).

Nice ending!

(the part I didn't like, was the way the two policemen ambushed the hotel room)
 
Cracker Funk said:
Nice work, Gonzo. I do like the story. I think we could get where we need to go, a lot faster, though. Pacing is lacking, for sure. For example, in the beginning, do we really need to see every single count? Couldn't an effectively-edited montage do the trick?
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Well, CF, I actually counted how many times he kissed each head of the siamese - twins - doll :).
9 times.
His superstitions and obsessiveness with 9, motivate the ending. It's important.

I even think, the beginning was too FAST paced... because It was like: "Hurry up and tell them all they need to know about the obsessive-compulsive protagonist"
The way to get away with this, is to show us the protagonist's character through a story, in which he has to make choices.

I'm right, innit, unless I'm wrong :lol:
 
Indeed. In some ways it WAS rushed in the sense of dumping the entire character development into a non-verbal scene lasting maybe 3 minutes. A lot of visual clues going on. The siamese twins (deformed, as he feels he is), the repeated use of mirrors because of his obesession with his "deformed" body image (The way he sees himself as opposed to the "real" way he appears), etc...

The intent is for all that to generate an "AH HA!" moment at the end when it all suddenly makes sense.

I absolutely committed to bringing this in at the film festival friendly length of 12 minutes. That directly led to some of my choices as well.
 
Definitely got the "AH HA" at the end, and appreciated the intro for that. I may have shot it differently at the beginning but I wouldn't have shortened it or abbreviated the counting. The only part that confused me and maybe I missed something earlier, but why the hotel? What about the hotel in his mind was important for him to go there and spend money (didn't appear he had a lot.)

I did laugh when he unflinchingly turned the corner to follow the girl with the number 9 shirt. That was good and definitely made me laugh. It was like distracting a little kid with a shiny thing. Awesome.
 
I admit, I didn't get the reason for his obsessiveness. Him feeling, that his body is deformed, when he appears sort of physically normal to us (apart from the blue under his eye...Impressive)

Now the ending makes even more sense to me.
But, boy, did I like the scene with the changing points of view while he was looking at the mirror!
 
kinglis said:
I admit, I didn't get the reason for his obsessiveness. Him feeling, that his body is deformed, when he appears sort of physically normal to us (apart from the blue under his eye...Impressive)

Now the ending makes even more sense to me.
But, boy, did I like the scene with the changing points of view while he was looking at the mirror!
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All the obsession with 9...
10 - 1 = ?

Well...
The motel is the "true" part of the story. It's based on a story told to us by a motel clerk at a film festival in Kentucky. She found exactly those objects on a table in a room. I created the "why?".
 
Gonzo_Entertainment said:
The motel is the "true" part of the story. It's based on a story told to us by a motel clerk at a film festival in Kentucky. She found exactly those objects on a table in a room. I created the "why?".
Click to expand...

I had no problem with the protagonist choosing to go to a hotel in order to wank and chop his finger (10-1=9) :lol: (I've watched too many french movies).

It was inspired by a true story?!! Told to you by a hotel clerk?!!...
I can see the film told from different points of view... I love this style, I can't believe you didn't take advantage...
 
Thanks.

Watched it.

Lemme know if you want my thoughts!

Overall it was very well done.

And how the hell did you rack focus so smoothly with a takumar? hehe.
 
Some good and some bad focus pulls for sure. My DP is stellar, (he did that big rack in the motel lobby). The 1st AC... so much. The 1st AC (a film school kid) did a horrible job with glidecam too. We had to run it through warp stabilizer on crazy high settings to make it usable.

Like EVERY movie, hindsight is 20/20 for sure. I'm pretty happy with it though. I think it is a progression from The Island on a lot of fronts.
 
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