Logline: A leader of a criminal organisation realises that he has fallen for the wrong woman, his best friend's girlfriend.
Link to the script: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1c_2ZaIdpMPF_buaBbZzu4JIzR0viTIPP/view?usp=sharing
Would really appreciate feedback on the following:
Do I have a clear beginning , middle and end?
What do you think about the dialogue?
Have I used the whole 'subject + verb' rule correctly?
Is the resolution an interesting one? The flashforwards are meant to be visions that are cut during the last embrace we see on screen.
Lastly, the title is a work in progress so do not fret about that please.
Thank you in advance for the feedback and taking the time to read it.
Link to the script: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1c_2ZaIdpMPF_buaBbZzu4JIzR0viTIPP/view?usp=sharing
Would really appreciate feedback on the following:
Do I have a clear beginning , middle and end?
What do you think about the dialogue?
Have I used the whole 'subject + verb' rule correctly?
Is the resolution an interesting one? The flashforwards are meant to be visions that are cut during the last embrace we see on screen.
Lastly, the title is a work in progress so do not fret about that please.
Thank you in advance for the feedback and taking the time to read it.