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watch My new film, "The Art of Falling in Love" (2012) Trailer!

My new film's, "The Art of Falling in Love" (2012), Trailer!

I'd love some feedback from you guys!

www.vimeo.com/mpatrickheywood/artoffallinginlovetrailer1

"If I'm not supposed to fall in love with every girl that I meet, why does Hollywood torture me with the idea that I am?"

Some quick info about the film:

Connor is a young man who can't seem to separate his expectations of love versus the reality of it. When he meets Kim, an abrasive young woman who decides to antagonize him, his Hollywood-influenced ideas of love are put to the test.

Written, Directed, Produced, and Edited by M. Patrick Heywood
Starring Cameron Torres, Rachel Tondreault
Cinematography by John Wood Quartana
Sound by Raymond Howard
Musical Composition by Eli Bigelow
Special Thanks to Rule Camera Boston
Dedicated to My Mother, Kelly J. Heywood
Film to be released in Spring 2012

Music Featured in trailer:
-Collecting Things by Jon Brion
-Take Your Time (Coming Home) by fun.

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If I could make a few suggestions, albeit it in the screening room.

You might want to reword/rewrite your synopsis. The pacing of the last two lines are a little disjointed.

Change "Who's" to "Whose". Perhaps "Ideas on love" to "Ideas of love". (It gives "Love" an existence)

I would, for the sake of any confusion, replace "Heads crash" for something more apt and generic. (Remember that the synopsis is as important as your trailer, so don't sell it short)

The last line, like I said, fails to deliver the conflict. It's purely down to pacing. Perhaps it's just a tad lengthy. Trim and cut.

Writing is rewriting.

I'm not sure whether it is you're looking for critique on your trailer, or whether it's finished and ready to ship. Let me know.

Best of luck!
 
If I could make a few suggestions, albeit it in the screening room.

You might want to reword/rewrite your synopsis. The pacing of the last two lines are a little disjointed.

Change "Who's" to "Whose". Perhaps "Ideas on love" to "Ideas of love". (It gives "Love" an existence)

I would, for the sake of any confusion, replace "Heads crash" for something more apt and generic. (Remember that the synopsis is as important as your trailer, so don't sell it short)

The last line, like I said, fails to deliver the conflict. It's purely down to pacing. Perhaps it's just a tad lengthy. Trim and cut.

Writing is rewriting.

I'm not sure whether it is you're looking for critique on your trailer, or whether it's finished and ready to ship. Let me know.

Best of luck!

I appreciate the feedback, especially on the synopsis. It's a really tough film to write a synopsis piece, because it's a character piece more than anything... but that synopsis really does the film no justice. That advice is hugely helpful. I'm going to edit the post right now with a hopefully better one!

EDIT: Does the edited one work better?

The trailer is pretty much a completed project, but feedback is still welcome. I'm always looking to learn.
 
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That's alot better. It's short and straight to the point. But it could still use a couple of revisions.

Read through your Movie collection. Try to write as many versions as you can, and make a decision afterward. (Or put them to the folk here, I'm sure they will help you decide)

Synopsis' are tough.
 
That's alot better. It's short and straight to the point. But it could still use a couple of revisions.

Read through your Movie collection. Try to write as many versions as you can, and make a decision afterward. (Or put them to the folk here, I'm sure they will help you decide)

Synopsis' are tough.

That's a great idea. Thank you. What did you think of the trailer?
 
I thought it looked good. I think the trailer would look better if it ended with the kiss. I think maybe shorten the trailer a bit too in editing. I am debating if the colors and brightness look right. I will let some one else chime in on that. My first thought is that it could be a little brighter. I am not sure exactly why I think it does look kinda dingy looking. I think going from the white background of the intro title to the film shows a sharpe contrast of brightness and maybe that is part of the reason I think the footage looks too dark.
 
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I thought it looked good. I think the trailer would look better if it ended with the kiss. I think maybe shorten the trailer a bit too in editing. I am debating if the colors and brightness look right. I will let some one else chime in on that. My first thought is that it could be a little brighter. I am not sure exactly why I think it does look kinda dingy looking. I think going from the white background of the intro title to the film shows a sharpe contrast of brightness and maybe that is part of the reason I think the footage looks too dark.

Thank you for the feedback. You know, watching it I completely agree about the darkness. That's not the footage, that's me not taking the time to properly color correct because I was so eager to get a trailer out there, so I just threw a preset from Magic Bullet Looks on there. The footage isn't nearly that dark. I'm going to properly color correct the footage for the film and he trailer but I get what you're saying. I really appreciate the critique.
 
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