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Need help with story/character development!

W

winchcombe

Hi guys

Wondering if you can help me. I am currently working on a short film idea, comedy/drama, 5-10 mins in length. It is based around a marriage therapist, Jack, who's having an affair with the wife of one of the couples he's treating.

The film opens with the couple, Rich and Jody, in Jack's office, deep in conversation about their marriage, Jack listening intently as they talk. When the conversation lulls, Jack steps in, praises the couple for their progress and gently ushers them out of the room, saying he'll see them again soon.

On their way out of the building, Jody remembers she has left her bag in the office, and tells Rich to head on out to the car. She walks back down the corridor to Jack's office, and upon reaching his door, knocks and waits for a response. She doesn't get one, so cautiously opens it and enters the office. She picks up her bag from the floor and calls out his name, again to no avail. Suddenly, Jack swoops in from behind the door and gathers her up in his arms, passionately kissing her.

The title then appears onscreen.

From then on, I'm not sure where to take it. I know I need something to happen to change the status quo, forcing the main character to make a decision, and then show the ensuing struggle the character faces before creating a new status quo, but I don't know exactly what should happen. What should change the status quo? What decision should the character make?

If you could answer any of these questions, it would be much appreciated. Please feel free to suggest anything you think could help.

Many thanks,
Joe
 
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As a comedy short, I think it would be hilarious to then have the husband find an excuse to go back inside. He then plants a big kiss on the therapist. A few fades between the two couplings and contrasted by screaming matches in the therapy room. Then have the wife walk in on her husband and the therapist. This leads to the culminating argument between the wife and husband and they resolve their issue. The therapist looks on dumbfounded as they walk out hand-in-hand after the wife slaps him and the husband punches him. The raw masculine surge in her husband exciting her. I think that's doable in 5-10 minutes.
 
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First of all, I think this is a great idea. I was literally smiling reading it, imagining the scene play out in my head.

And, well, this seems like you should make it character based, just a bit. Write about these characters, don't just make them brainless cliches. After you write a little about the characters and their backstories (the woman who is cheating could have trust issues, I don't know) try to figure out the natural progression with these characters. Pretend these characters are your friends; what do you think they would do in this situation?

Of course, don't substitute comedy for characterization. I really do think characters make up any film, but this is a short film, not a movie. The stakes should be high, without being unbelievable. You can establish that this isn't the first time that the marriage therapist has cheated with a patient for example, so this would be an emotional journey for him (as well as a funny one, if you write good dialogue and maybe, for example, flashback to a montage of him kissing more and more past patients in weirder and weirder situations).

There are two ways you can go with this. You can make something funny, but also emotional, or just funny. That choice is up to you, but I hope I have helped in some way! Good luck with the film.
 
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