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Old 10-10-2011, 03:19 PM   #1
The One Who Knocks
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Organ Trafficking Response

Hi reader. I am currently in the midst of pre-production on a PSA-like project, which aims to enlighten viewers on the topic of Organ Trafficking. I have gotten to the point where I have completed a treatment (I think this is the right word for it)

The concept of the film is fairly basic, it simply revolves around showing how a typical Organ trafficking deal is conducted, and the consequences for the ones involved.



Act one:


The film opens in an empty warehouse. It is an ugly place that is both battered and tattered. A superimposed text comes up, telling us that we´re in Pakistan. Before long the warehouse door opens, and several impoverished Pakistani dressed in ragged clothes enter their workplace. We see them carry out their everyday labor; stacking boxes, carrying boxes and alike.

We then direct our attention to a specific worker of this facility. He is a fairly young Pakistani man who has been assigned the job of manually moving heavy boxes from one place to another. It is hard work, but he manages.

Now, we begin cross cutting between this Pakistani man and another man who is thousands of miles away. The other man is a very wealthy old man who is living in an unspecified rich western country. He is a sickly looking and wheelchair bound. We watch as he in his home prepares for an imminent flight. He packs his bags, gathers his passport, orders a taxi and picks up his airline ticket, which is for a travel to Pakistan.


(During this, the following text will be superimposed during clips of the Pakistani man)
” He has little other choice than to say yes

He is in dire need of the money

They say it is not dangerous ”



The wheelchair bound man is now rolling out the front door. We clearly spot a bowl of fresh fruit in proximity of the door. He closes the door. Fade out


Act two:


Fade in. The door opens, in walks the same man. He is no longer wheelchair bound, nor is he sickly looking. The bowl of fruit is now severely rotten and dust saturates the cupboard beneath, we thus realize time has passed.

Cutting back to the Pakistani man, we see him still carrying out the same labor as he did previously. Though lacking the relative ease he showed before. He is severely struggling and sweating immensely. He breathes heavy and his knees shackle as he moves forward.


(Meanwhile, the following text is superimposed)
“He never did get the money they promised.

He did not receive a proper treatment

He wound up with severe damages to his health”


He ends up not being able to carry the box further. He collapses to the ground. During the fall his shirt got lifted up to his chest. As he is lying on the ground we clearly see a kidney scar on his body.


(The following text appears)
"This was the thanks he got for saving a life. "


We now cut to he wealthy westerner who is in his bedroom, he is topless and in the midst of putting on a shirt. We see that he also has a kidney scar.

We cut back to the Pakistani man who continues his struggle.


(The following text is superimposed)
“Each year, thousands of the worlds most impoverished find themselves having to illegally sell their organs for money.

Because of long waiting lines on legal organ transplantations, the demand is high.

The high demand drives the prices up to a level that only the richest are able to afford.

The donors do however only receive a small fraction of the earnings, they are also regularly promised more than they end up getting.

Middlemen take the lion’s share.

Donors often experience severe damages to their health after the operation as a result of poor medical care and follow up care.

How would you thank someone who saved your life?”


--The End--


I am just hoping to receive some general feedback about what you think about the piece. Any suggestions are welcome, and I´d be glad to answer any questions


.
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Old 10-11-2011, 04:28 PM   #2
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Who or what is the market for this PSA vignette?
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:56 AM   #3
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The film is for an anti-human trafficking contest.
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Old 10-12-2011, 07:04 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The One Who Knocks View Post
The film is for an anti-human trafficking contest.
No, I mean WHOOOOO is going to be watching it.
Specifically, WHO is the market?
Their demographic?
Broadcast TV?
2 in the afternoon?
>8 at night?
Investors?
Fundraiser at the senate? a high school? the local met museum? opera house? cat house?

Who do you want to be aware of organ trafficking?
And are you seeking funding from them?
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Old 10-12-2011, 08:39 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayw View Post
No, I mean WHOOOOO is going to be watching it.
Specifically, WHO is the market?
Their demographic?
Broadcast TV?
2 in the afternoon?
>8 at night?
Investors?
Fundraiser at the senate? a high school? the local met museum? opera house? cat house?

Who do you want to be aware of organ trafficking?
And are you seeking funding from them?

Aah… gotcha.

First of all the film is budgeted entirely from the crew´s pockets. The film´s negative cost isn´t especially high though, the budget will primarily go to the cast and crews hunger and thirst needs.

The film will not very likely be broadcasted in any spectacular way; it will likely only go the path of vimeo/youtube.

As for the target demographic; truth to be told, the film will be made for a contest, and I would be lying if I said that we did not have the middle aged judges of the contest in mind when we were conceptualizing. However I would not say that the film is in any way limited to that audience. I think the film can cater to a wide demographic, as the goal of the film is largely to simply inform people of the issue at hand. So... I really do hope that the message will be heard by a wide array of people.
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Old 10-12-2011, 02:00 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The One Who Knocks View Post
As for the target demographic; truth to be told, the film will be made for a contest, and I would be lying if I said that we did not have the middle aged judges of the contest in mind when we were conceptualizing. However I would not say that the film is in any way limited to that audience. I think the film can cater to a wide demographic, as the goal of the film is largely to simply inform people of the issue at hand. So... I really do hope that the message will be heard by a wide array of people.
Okay, lemme try this one more time...

The middle aged judges, which I could very well be one myself, will be judging your PSA on how effective it plays for a particular audience to get them to do something.
A - You're NOT making this for the judges.
B - You ARE making this for another audience.
C - You want that audience to either be educated and do nothing - or - be educated and do something.
D - The judges WILL be judging on how effective your PSA potentially achieves that goal.

You gotta let go of any "wide array of people" approach.
You gotta hit the nail on the head.
Sink it home.

Will this PSA be preaching to the converted?
Will this PSA be cracking some hard hearts?
Will this PSA be applied toward gaining more government taxpayer funding?

Anyone who gives two figs in a fart don't really care about poor old Pakistan Pete.
Sux2Bhim.
The guy that bought his kidney also employs 10,000 Americans. Do I really wanna watch that guy die?
Who are the little old moral ladies that are gonna cough up their utility vs medicine money to fund "Hey mister rich Dude! We need more government oversight on your black market organ theft"!?
Where are these people with the money to make black market organ donation more safe?
THAT is the audience for this PSA.
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Old 10-12-2011, 04:27 PM   #7
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Organ trafficking is a subject that a great deal many people aren´t that very well versed in. In years prior it was largely thought of as a myth, though in recent years people gradually learn more about it.

The thing is that, often uninformed people who have heard of it in passing do not think very much of it. It is an understandable assumption to make that this is not really a tremendous problem. People who will die in waiting lines for a transplant travel the globe to a third world nation in search for a donor. They then pay a destitute chap for donating something that we gladly give away for free. It is a fair trade, no?

The problem of course lies in the exploitation of the donors.

The goal of the film is largely to debunk the myth that the trade is entirely fair and enlightening people of how the trade really transpires for the ones involved. Additionally functioning as an introduction to those who´ve never heard of the matter.

I do not know of any specific people to convince in order for the problem to perish, frankly I doubt there are any in my particular nation. The film is not made to promote an organization such as Organ watch, it is a free standing piece.

My goal is not for this to be a “call to arms”, my goal is to enlighten, debunk myths and to create awareness. Something that I would consider hugely important if any change is to be made in the future.

It is important to know that the exact goal of the contest as they´ve written is to enlighten, debunk myths and to create awareness about human trafficking. Perhaps I should have made this more clear earlier.


I hope this is and adequate answer.
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Old 10-12-2011, 04:50 PM   #8
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I think the directions provided to you are cr@p and that you're in the unfortunate position of determining from those cr@p directions exactly what i'm failing to determine only because you've been given cr@p to deal with.

Given that vague and nebulous criteria, I think what you've outlined in your original post is adequate.
It'll outrage high school do-gooders to raise a stink with their inattentive parents.
It'll make the little old ladies aware so that they may cry to their Congresspeople.
It'll humanize this to gala attendees so that maybe they'll write few charitable donation checks and invest in whatever congresspeople will begin instituting enhanced watchdog organizations.

You can't really knock an ad campaign out of the park when no one seems to know where the h3ll the park is.
"I'm aware that there's a park around here. Somewhere".
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Old 10-13-2011, 05:54 AM   #9
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Of course, this film was never meant to be the end-all be-all curer of the trafficking problem. It is an initiatory stepping-stone that gets a simple message across. I do not think that this film will solve the problem in and of itself, it never really was supposed to.

Frankly, I do not know if getting an outright ban on transplant tourism is the right way to go about either. Many people who are faced with death will resort to breaking the law if it means they get to live another day. I would call this a very understandable thought.

I think the largest problem as it stands now is the black market that exists which severely exploits the donors.
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Old 10-13-2011, 06:43 AM   #10
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Agreed.

In biz world the term is "low barrier to entry".
This isn't building commercial airliners or operating a iron ore mine.
Any doctor which has lost his license and can develop relationships with the appropriate individuals is now a potential organ trafficker.
Just like any other black market organization.
Screwit. The law just looks at it as another criminal activity since it can't even be regulated in any practical sense.
Cars can be regulated.
Houses can be regulated.
Schools can be regulated.
H3ll, even hair stylists and cosmetologists can be regulated.
But poaching, chop shops, drug and organ trafficking? Forget it.

Stupid contest.
Make a good short just the same.

Do you have access to an actor that could pass as Pakistani?
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Old 10-13-2011, 08:05 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayw View Post

Do you have access to an actor that could pass as Pakistani?
Yes, in fact I’ve got the entire crew, locations and cast locked down. I only wanted to get a quality check on my current script, as there is still some time left for last minute changes.
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Old 10-13-2011, 08:53 AM   #12
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Then it's fine.
Go with it.

The undefined vanilla audience will then have an image of how organ trafficking works.

GL.
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Old 10-13-2011, 02:42 PM   #13
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I´m elated to have been given your blessing rayw
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Old 10-13-2011, 03:41 PM   #14
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LOL!
Hopefuly your pool of actors can emote better than their director.
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Old 10-13-2011, 06:46 PM   #15
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My actors can out-emote the best
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