Eddie, you seem sincere, but I couldn't make it all the way through TPW (gee, that TLA is kind of addictive). I must say I enjoyed most of the locations, and shot-framing, even some of the casting, and the general quirkiness of the piece. But the acting wasn't happening, and the editing either. Problems with both eclipse the absurdity of the story, which was actually so over the top that I found myself reluctantly intrigued. From the issues that arose for me, it almost appears as though you haven't watched enough movies/television. To use a blunt metaphor, the movie seemed autistic.
Find a movie that you really like a lot. Watch it. Watch it again. Watch it again. Watch it until you no longer pay any attention to the story, the acting, what's going on. Then you'll start noticing how long scenes take, where the scene cuts are, how the Director and Editor create dramatic and comedic tension and release. Then watch it some more. This is like training for long distance running, at this point you have to move past the boredom to where you view the movie from a different space entirely. Movies are a lot like music, they have a rhythm. Watch it with the sound off. Watch your own work with the sound off. There should be a discernible tempo, or ebb and flow. People have to care about what you're doing. You need to be aware of this in every step of production. We don't create work in a vacuum for only ourselves. How boring that is! Watch it again. Then watch something in a completely different genre, and notice how the pacing is different. You seem to have a grasp of the visual aspects, if you can work your pacing better and find some better actors (look for theatrical troops, standup comedians, local "characters" who ham it up wherever they are), you'll do fine with your next project. Filmmaking is collaborative, don't be afraid to let others in on your process, you can only learn and grow. Don't worry about the naysayers, they aren't filmmakers.
