Hey Guys,
I just wanted to make a post about inspiration. I have a lot of it, and recently it has been doubling every year. I am inspired to make ultra immersive, personal, visceral science fiction and fantasy films that border on the surreal and are steeped in lore. Lately the ideas won't stop coming, and it didn't used to be like that. I wanted to share a bit about how I get my inspiration. Note: I have not accomplished anything amazing yet in my career, just a few short films. I can only work on my cinema on nights and weekends, but I have been making progress lately, have been more confident because my ideas are starting to become very focused, and like I said: I'm bursting with inspiration.
I thought I was bursting with inspiration when I was 22...heck, i've had the rush of ideas since I was a kid, but all chaos. I am now 32, and I'm realizing that, while I was very inspired at that age, most of it was angst, undirected energy and impatience. I had a lot of unfocused ideas, many of them visual, which was cool. But I would get very anxious, VERY worked up, if I wasn't able to express them right away. I would even get very threatened or panicked if I saw a really good, new science fiction movie. I had a massive fear of missing out and an incredible feeling of helplessness. I made a short when I was 24, and was working on corporates a lot, and then commercials, and while I was learning a lot about the production craft, the chaotic ideas and helpless feelings would really get me down, and continued to until fairly recently.
Fast forward several years, and while I have struggled this whole time, I am starting to get a handle on reconciling my ideas/passion/inspiration with my daily life. For all of my adult life until about 4 years ago, I continued to pursue things that I thought were important to me when I was younger. I would work out often, pursue relationships, socialize often, accept gigs that were actually meaningless but "could," lead to something. But I would always end up unsatisfied, or feeling panicked and rushed.
At a certain point, I realized that I needed to dedicate myself fully to the creative feelings I was having. Some of my filmmaker buddies felt content continuing their personal life as they always have, and they could still contain the ideas and feelings they were having. I realized I could not, things had really changed. I started to live in the worlds that were pervading my thought. I started to spend more time alone, reading and thinking. I started to watch movies and shows that may have had only one redeeming thing about them, but they inspired me. I started to fully invest my recreational time into the only thing I want to do for pure enjoyment: playing ultra immersive, simulation PC games. Good lord did THAT take me to new worlds lol. And most of all, I have continued my deep exploration of experimental music.
All in all, I started to only engage in the things I wanted to, and unfortunately NEED to. Yeah, I gotta have the day job. Just is an unfortunate reality, and it absolutely slows down my art and the development of my ideas and projects. But right now I can't control that. HOWEVER, I CAN control my free time. I did away with all the guilt for not feeling inclined to maintain a romantic relationship with a girl (let's face it, a lot of the time we end up in a relationship we hate because we felt pressured) I did away with any pressure to impress people with my job or the things I wear. I did away with "killing time," at bars or someone's apartment, like so many of my friends are fond of doing. I started to concentrate on furthering my ideas, my inspiration, my knowledge of the cinematic art and the pursuit of my projects. And it's been a new life for me.
What I'm trying to tell you is that the mundane things in your life, the people that are stuck in a rut, the very natural attitude of people to want to comfort themselves with a notion of contentedness if they can at least survive for the long term....all of these things can REALLY limit your inspiration and imagination. Folks that don't feel the way you feel, will try and convince you to feel the way they feel, so things are easier and more content. My ex did that...if I tried to include her in my imaginings or my cinematic dreams, it scared the shit out of her. Was too daunting, too stressful. She wanted me to shut off and make my head a blank void at the end of the day so we could just relax and be comfortable....not because I was making my stress her own...the very act of letting my imagination run wild and discussing an idea would frustrate her. She didn't want to think about it.
In the same way, trying to bring my friends into my world of ultra immersive PC gaming, experimental electronic music, science fiction and fantasy content/products, and in general a world filled with stories and characters....trying to bring my friends into ANY aspect of those things or my creative outlook in general, has resulted in disappointment on my part, and confusion on their part.
If you really want to make your mark in cinema, or just accomplish certain things with your cinematic art, let yourself be as creatively free as you possibly can. Explore things you are interested in....it's not selfish, it is in pursuit of your dream. If people are stopping you from doing this, spend less time with them. If an aspect of your life is prohibiting this, make a big change somewhere. If your accountant friend has the same exact schedule every day, spends all his time busting his ass for his spouse or kids, gets his relaxation from watching the millionth new TV show that was released that week which someone else picked for him without him even being interested in it...if he's putting forth a lot of effort to appear a certain way for people, if he's just sort of going with the flow, rolling with the punches, blanking out his brain every night after work...AND he's suggesting that YOU should do the same, in any way shape or form, PLEASE realize he is saying that because his goals and pursuits do not require any sort of creative, innovative thought whatsoever, nor do they require him to dedicate extra personal time to achieve. AND, he will assume that this will be the best for you as well, because he will not know what it feels like to be inspired to create art or some other expressive thing.
I'm not saying this theoretical "accountant," friend is bad, or TRYING to bring you down. But because the art of cinema is so deep and complex, many of the mundane, outwardly prudent things people want you to spend your precious time on WILL bring you down, and jeopardize your film pursuits. Most folks, industries and societal trends JUST DON'T GET IT. Fuck...even many successful Youtubers get completely confused when they compare their videos to the craft of cinema, and state that you should just go make anything and put it on Youtube.
TL/DR:
Just do what you are inspired to do, within moral and financial boundaries obviously, regardless of how your family/friends can ostracize you (and they may). It is more important to find and focus your inspiration, and be PATIENT while you do so. Then, stay true to your inspiration, no matter what family member, friend, boss or dickhead producer does to try and stop you.
Here is a bit of music that really inspires me, enjoy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GFJ_gfsTKs
I just wanted to make a post about inspiration. I have a lot of it, and recently it has been doubling every year. I am inspired to make ultra immersive, personal, visceral science fiction and fantasy films that border on the surreal and are steeped in lore. Lately the ideas won't stop coming, and it didn't used to be like that. I wanted to share a bit about how I get my inspiration. Note: I have not accomplished anything amazing yet in my career, just a few short films. I can only work on my cinema on nights and weekends, but I have been making progress lately, have been more confident because my ideas are starting to become very focused, and like I said: I'm bursting with inspiration.
I thought I was bursting with inspiration when I was 22...heck, i've had the rush of ideas since I was a kid, but all chaos. I am now 32, and I'm realizing that, while I was very inspired at that age, most of it was angst, undirected energy and impatience. I had a lot of unfocused ideas, many of them visual, which was cool. But I would get very anxious, VERY worked up, if I wasn't able to express them right away. I would even get very threatened or panicked if I saw a really good, new science fiction movie. I had a massive fear of missing out and an incredible feeling of helplessness. I made a short when I was 24, and was working on corporates a lot, and then commercials, and while I was learning a lot about the production craft, the chaotic ideas and helpless feelings would really get me down, and continued to until fairly recently.
Fast forward several years, and while I have struggled this whole time, I am starting to get a handle on reconciling my ideas/passion/inspiration with my daily life. For all of my adult life until about 4 years ago, I continued to pursue things that I thought were important to me when I was younger. I would work out often, pursue relationships, socialize often, accept gigs that were actually meaningless but "could," lead to something. But I would always end up unsatisfied, or feeling panicked and rushed.
At a certain point, I realized that I needed to dedicate myself fully to the creative feelings I was having. Some of my filmmaker buddies felt content continuing their personal life as they always have, and they could still contain the ideas and feelings they were having. I realized I could not, things had really changed. I started to live in the worlds that were pervading my thought. I started to spend more time alone, reading and thinking. I started to watch movies and shows that may have had only one redeeming thing about them, but they inspired me. I started to fully invest my recreational time into the only thing I want to do for pure enjoyment: playing ultra immersive, simulation PC games. Good lord did THAT take me to new worlds lol. And most of all, I have continued my deep exploration of experimental music.
All in all, I started to only engage in the things I wanted to, and unfortunately NEED to. Yeah, I gotta have the day job. Just is an unfortunate reality, and it absolutely slows down my art and the development of my ideas and projects. But right now I can't control that. HOWEVER, I CAN control my free time. I did away with all the guilt for not feeling inclined to maintain a romantic relationship with a girl (let's face it, a lot of the time we end up in a relationship we hate because we felt pressured) I did away with any pressure to impress people with my job or the things I wear. I did away with "killing time," at bars or someone's apartment, like so many of my friends are fond of doing. I started to concentrate on furthering my ideas, my inspiration, my knowledge of the cinematic art and the pursuit of my projects. And it's been a new life for me.
What I'm trying to tell you is that the mundane things in your life, the people that are stuck in a rut, the very natural attitude of people to want to comfort themselves with a notion of contentedness if they can at least survive for the long term....all of these things can REALLY limit your inspiration and imagination. Folks that don't feel the way you feel, will try and convince you to feel the way they feel, so things are easier and more content. My ex did that...if I tried to include her in my imaginings or my cinematic dreams, it scared the shit out of her. Was too daunting, too stressful. She wanted me to shut off and make my head a blank void at the end of the day so we could just relax and be comfortable....not because I was making my stress her own...the very act of letting my imagination run wild and discussing an idea would frustrate her. She didn't want to think about it.
In the same way, trying to bring my friends into my world of ultra immersive PC gaming, experimental electronic music, science fiction and fantasy content/products, and in general a world filled with stories and characters....trying to bring my friends into ANY aspect of those things or my creative outlook in general, has resulted in disappointment on my part, and confusion on their part.
If you really want to make your mark in cinema, or just accomplish certain things with your cinematic art, let yourself be as creatively free as you possibly can. Explore things you are interested in....it's not selfish, it is in pursuit of your dream. If people are stopping you from doing this, spend less time with them. If an aspect of your life is prohibiting this, make a big change somewhere. If your accountant friend has the same exact schedule every day, spends all his time busting his ass for his spouse or kids, gets his relaxation from watching the millionth new TV show that was released that week which someone else picked for him without him even being interested in it...if he's putting forth a lot of effort to appear a certain way for people, if he's just sort of going with the flow, rolling with the punches, blanking out his brain every night after work...AND he's suggesting that YOU should do the same, in any way shape or form, PLEASE realize he is saying that because his goals and pursuits do not require any sort of creative, innovative thought whatsoever, nor do they require him to dedicate extra personal time to achieve. AND, he will assume that this will be the best for you as well, because he will not know what it feels like to be inspired to create art or some other expressive thing.
I'm not saying this theoretical "accountant," friend is bad, or TRYING to bring you down. But because the art of cinema is so deep and complex, many of the mundane, outwardly prudent things people want you to spend your precious time on WILL bring you down, and jeopardize your film pursuits. Most folks, industries and societal trends JUST DON'T GET IT. Fuck...even many successful Youtubers get completely confused when they compare their videos to the craft of cinema, and state that you should just go make anything and put it on Youtube.
TL/DR:
Just do what you are inspired to do, within moral and financial boundaries obviously, regardless of how your family/friends can ostracize you (and they may). It is more important to find and focus your inspiration, and be PATIENT while you do so. Then, stay true to your inspiration, no matter what family member, friend, boss or dickhead producer does to try and stop you.
Here is a bit of music that really inspires me, enjoy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GFJ_gfsTKs