• Wondering which camera, gear, computer, or software to buy? Ask in our Gear Guide.

Help with a logline.

H

harmonica44

I can't think of one to describe it all in once sentence. The plot goes: An innocent man is the suspect of murder of a victim, and for severely maiming two cops.

Cops who are friends of the maimed ones plot a revenge scheme to frame the man with evidence. Not just any kind of evidence but a new type of evidence which is newly introduced into the legal system with controversy as to whether or not it shall stand as evidence, and how it will effect future crime cases, and legalities from then on. Not only does the innocent man have to escape the evidence framing, but he also has to escape the real killers who have a blood vendetta against him.

This is the overall plot, and the real killers are a little more of a side plot, that does not need to be in the logline, so any ideas how what parts to use and condense down for the logline? Thanks.
 
Last edited:
Sort by date Sort by votes
Well the cops don't frame him, they just attempt to and everything goes wrong. So they don't succeed. Sorry for the confusion, I reworded my original OP. But it sounds kinda simple, doesn't it? Do you think I should mention how they use a new type of evidence, to make it sound more unique?
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0 Downvote
"Cops disillusioned with the legal system attempt to frame an innocent man suspected of murder."

I wouldn't add the new type of evidence bit. I have no stake in trying to sell it so take it with a grain of salt, but it doesn't sound like the driving force of the film, so I'd leave it out.



Completely unrelated, but - I admire your enthusiasm. If you can keep up the level of inquisitiveness and enthusiasm I've seen from you since I've been coming around these forums (I guess about a week now) for the next decade or so - than the world is your oyster.
 
Upvote 0 Downvote
Okay thanks. I don't know if it's the driving force of the film, but the evidence gathering does take up a fair portion of it, and the climax. Even if I don't put it in the logline, then the logline has no original elements in though. What does it have to spark interest that doesn't sound the same as other movies?
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0 Downvote
it's finished, just need to edit and reword some of the action scenes more properly. The plot is entirely finished and written out, and since some contacts I made wanna see something of mine, I figure why not come up with a logline now.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0 Downvote
I really think the logline should be written BEFORE the script. Afterall, it's the frame you hang your entire story on, and having a really solid logline will almost force you to have a really solid script... almost.
 
Upvote 0 Downvote
Okay thanks. The MacGuffin is the original part of the premise, and the way the MacGuffin is manufactured is original too. Or at least I haven't seen a thriller with it. So I thought putting the original part of the plot it in the logline was good. But I'll use the logline that Arron suggested if it's good enough. Would it really get the reader interested?
 
Upvote 0 Downvote
If the evidence McGuffin is hooky enough it could work. All Indianna Jones movies start with a McGuffin. Can you tell us what it is, or would that be risky at this stage of development?
 
Upvote 0 Downvote
Well the MacGuffin is the big surprise in the story. The new type of evidence the crooked cops want to manufacture is an original type of evidence never used in court before in a movie, and the courts have to scientifically decide if it's legal, and make laws around it. That's the surprise ingredient of the story, so I would rather not give it away, with all due respect of course.
 
Upvote 0 Downvote
Okay so we've got:

(i) An innocent man suspected of murder (ii) attempts to clear his name while (iii) crooked cops (iv) bent on revenge (v) attempt to frame him and (vi) a battle of wits ensues.

I'm finding it difficult to put all this in one coherent sentence! Perhaps a couple of elements should be stripped? :P
 
Upvote 0 Downvote
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top