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watch FLANK :: A Short Action Film

Hey guys,
Caleb Fowler here with a short action film I just released about a month ago!

FLANK took acouple months to create. I wrote it myself, filmed it, directed it, edited it and produced it. The whole shebang. About 11-12 hours shooting time and I spent around 60 hours editing.
I'll admit there were some things I didn't factor in that affected the realism negatively. Ontop of that I didn't have a budget so we didn't spend anything. All locations were already available to us, as well as props and outfits/costumes.

Short bio of myself:

I am 15 years of age and I enjoy creating action shorts!
I live in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
I represent Aesthetic Creations (not promoting - just introducing myself)
I've been filming things for about 6 months now. And editing for about 3 years.

I'd like to know your thoughts!

Without any further ado, I present to you; FLANK.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQAX5TdKX_Y&feature=channel_video_title
 
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That looks beautiful. Solid cinematography, great paceing!
The only thing I would change are muzzle flashes...something about them seems...iffy. Yet, every muzzle flash added in post does, so, feel free to ignore this.
 
That looks beautiful. Solid cinematography, great paceing!
The only thing I would change are muzzle flashes...something about them seems...iffy. Yet, every muzzle flash added in post does, so, feel free to ignore this.

Thanks so much! :) What is it that you don't like about the muzzle flashes? So I can fix it later.
 
Well made. Way to exploit your actors physicality. I kept waiting for Bella to pop up in the opening scenes..

I think the SOUND of the guns drew unecessary attention to the muzzle flashes. For the flashes themselves make em brighter bigger and blurier and in bright daylight just straight white, rather then yellowish ..

The story started out clear, but then I wasnt quite sure who the group was chasing the bad guy, also, not sure why the sniper would break such great cover and attack on foot...
 
Well made. Way to exploit your actors physicality. I kept waiting for Bella to pop up in the opening scenes..

I think the SOUND of the guns drew unecessary attention to the muzzle flashes. For the flashes themselves make em brighter bigger and blurier and in bright daylight just straight white, rather then yellowish ..

The story started out clear, but then I wasnt quite sure who the group was chasing the bad guy, also, not sure why the sniper would break such great cover and attack on foot...

Thanks, I tried to make the sound design as realistic as possible. I thought the guns sounded pretty nice actually. Guess they don't?
Thanks for the advice though. At the end of Naomi (The computer) and Xavier's (The assassin) conversation naomi says to xavier "oh and xavier, bolton's men may follow fynes back to the hideout, leave no witnesses"

So, those guys are Bolton's men. And as for Xavier breaking from his cover, I actually filmed him climbing down... And when he gets to the ground that's when he sees boltons men over at Fynes' dead body. But I ended up not getting good footage of Xavier climbing down. So I didn't use it.
make sense?
 
I just don't like flashes, they stand out a bit too much. Try by doing what Wheat said. Remember, flashes are light. Did you ever see solid light?
 
I just don't like flashes, they stand out a bit too much. Try by doing what Wheat said. Remember, flashes are light. Did you ever see solid light?

I'm not exactly sure what you mean by this. Are you saying the flash of light that would be caused from the guns' muzzle flash? If so, I did add that for all the muzzle flashes..
 
ah, understand your story points now, but it did not come across in your edit for me. Just saying.

This is just feedback to help you improve, no criticism of how well what you already did came out..

Its not a complicated story line, but for something this short you REALLY have to be very specific with your plot points. Also, expository dialogue should be avoided at all cost. The only reason Naomi and Xavier are talking is so you can EXPLAIN (exposition) what is about to happen. You could have dramatized the information, maybe Naomi shows "video" of Bolton and his men planning the double cross or something like that. Just ideas to think about.
 
I'm not exactly sure what you mean by this. Are you saying the flash of light that would be caused from the guns' muzzle flash? If so, I did add that for all the muzzle flashes..

I think what is being suggested is that your flashes are too "SOLID" looking.. I agree. Play with different transfer modes and get some transparency in there.. and since its bright day light, they'll almost be invisible..

for sound, "realistic" is never what movie sound is about.. paraphrasing something I read once..

for a pistol, use the sound of a shotgun, for a shotgun use the sound of a howitzer, for a howitzer use the sound of an A BOMB!

The reverb is wrong for the gun sounds. That may be part of the sound file, but if you added it then try to change it to something else.

For a great example of gun sounds, check this vid out, I did the video, but ROC another forum member and sound pro, did ALL the sound in post.. http://www.youtube.com/user/sixbravo9
also, check the POV muzzle flashes near the end for what we mean by less solid ..
 
Great work, the action sequences were nicely paced and the photography was crisp, well shot.

I thought the gun sounds were a bit too... I don't know... Harsh? I think if they had a more muffled sound, it wouldn't have been so jarring. That said, I don't know much about guns, only "movie guns" :) Also the framing of the narrative was not very believable, it felt forced (the talking computer chick), and some of the decisions the forest gunmen made were practically suicidal (standing mournfully over a body that has just been taken out by a sniper!). But I suppose you just wanted to get to the action, so fair enough, bring on the gunfight!

Overall, solid effort. Better than 99% of the gunfight action movies you see on YouTube, I can tell a lot of thought went into the photography and choreography, well done.
 
Great work, the action sequences were nicely paced and the photography was crisp, well shot.

I thought the gun sounds were a bit too... I don't know... Harsh? I think if they had a more muffled sound, it wouldn't have been so jarring. That said, I don't know much about guns, only "movie guns" :) Also the framing of the narrative was not very believable, it felt forced (the talking computer chick), and some of the decisions the forest gunmen made were practically suicidal (standing mournfully over a body that has just been taken out by a sniper!). But I suppose you just wanted to get to the action, so fair enough, bring on the gunfight!

Overall, solid effort. Better than 99% of the gunfight action movies you see on YouTube, I can tell a lot of thought went into the photography and choreography, well done.

Well, thank you sir. :)
 
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