I read the first 4 pages so far. Your intro/hook so to speak.
As far as premise, I'm not entirely sure what happens after page 4 yet however, if you are writing a story about some white trash vampires, that actually could be pretty funny.
Now as for the first 4 pages there are some issues so take this as more format/structure than premise feedback.
You have 4 scenes that really are either 1 scene OR should be one scene and a Series of Shots.
Inside a Closet isn't really an opening scene. That infers you are INSIDE the closet. I recommend addressing this in one of a few different ways.
Set the opening in the bedroom as the scene. If you do this then you need to SET the scene of what the bedroom is like. THEN you can add an action paragraph that focuses on the wall with the closet door (with a Bella Twilight poster on it for added touch
) which then OPENS revealing what's inside. Then the hand grabs the jacket, etc...
The other way is to open it as INT. BEDROOM WALL if you are intent on the contents of the closet being the opening visual (with a Lost Boys poster on the door
Either way it sounds like you either need to simplify the scene to the actions Jake takes OR make a Series of Shots: Jake puts on makeup. Jake puts on colored contact lenses, etc.
Also (and this applies to screenwriting in general although I don't have a problem with it, it's considered bad form in a general sense) avoid "we see, we hear, is seen, is heard" type descriptions.
In your case instead of "a loud coughing is heard" (ie. telling the reader what we see and hear) it should be something like "There is loud COUGHING outside the room" or "Outside his room..." or "Somewhere else in the house a person COUGHS loudly".
Next, identify the voices heard as female or male as in this case it's his mom and dad.
You also have a Jason showing up in your 4th scene. Who is Jason? I'm guessing it should be Jake and that is where you may want to consider a Series of Shots.
Lastly, and this isn't format, but if this is supposed to be comedy and his parents are vampires, maybe their argument could be more Vampire centric? Like instead of "Go jump in a lake" it should be "Why don't you go sunbathing!" or "I swear woman, if I had a wooden stake...." or "Go bite the neck of a sepsis patient" or "Go stake yourself!" something like that.
Well I guess that wasn't lastly, introduce the parents better. Give them some character like is the Mom a Vampire version of Honey BooBoo's mom? What's his dad like? He wearing a Homer Simpson "SMRT" shirt over his beer belly?
Those first 4 pages have got to HOOK people in. They have to be WORTHY of celluloid or they get cut or improved to be worthy of celluloid. Dress up the scenes and spruce up the dialogue a bit.