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Old 10-06-2017, 06:43 PM   #1
BamFilms
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My first teaser

Here is my 30 second teaser on the film I am making.
Notes:
This is my very first film
This is the first time i have ever used an editing program.
I did the camera, sound and directing myself, so i do know it lacks some.
Its just a concept trailer so not perfect.
Thanks for any comments, suggestions, critisism.
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Old Today   #1A
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Old 10-06-2017, 06:54 PM   #2
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Hey man! I hope you are open to criticism. Take out the names of the people since they are not stars, there's no need for them. Also, a teaser is supposed to tease, and this didn't. It was names, and pics of that person after, so it looked more like an intro to a series...
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Old 10-06-2017, 07:31 PM   #3
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Yeah, That was the teaser just to get out there. The actual concept trailer is here:
But This probably isnt much better. Im learning, and Yes i take critisism.
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Old 10-07-2017, 05:02 AM   #4
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I know you're just starting out, so there's a lot to learn, but here are a couple things that I noticed, which could be pretty easily adressed. First is your pacing. This is something that takes time to learn in editing, but your "Teaser Trailer" drags on a little long. When you start out, you try to replicate what you know, so everyone ends up putting some crazy long title sequence right up front because they're used to seeing it at the beginning of their favorite movies. There's no need to do this, since the production companies and whatnot here are more or less irrelevant. Cut out all of that and show the viewers conent right out of the gate. Don't tell us what the movie is about, show us. The Second thing is your sound. Now I know just as much as everyone else here, how hard getting good sound is. But just like most other people in this forum, and in the industry, I also realize how crucial good sound is in making a good film. Put some research into good cheap ways to improve your sound recording, and also work on leveling out your sound in post. Right now, the music in this trailer is way louder than the dialouge, which is disconcerting to the viewer. Anyway, those are just my two cents, take it or leave it. Most importantly just keep making stuff, and learn from your mistakes.
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Old 10-07-2017, 08:01 AM   #5
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I definetly am learning. And its from mistakes. And even though this is my first time ever doing any of this I guess I am shocked that on this forum I have yet to recieve any good feedback, whereas everywhere else they may give constructive critisism but also let me know for a first timer, thats not too shaby. I do appreciate all the feedback though and I do want to better myself in these areas.
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Old 10-07-2017, 08:10 AM   #6
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Here is a question, Now that I have footage shot even though the sound is terrible, Can this be edited to sound good in premiere pro cc? I would love someone to help me there. Or does this need to be reshot all together?
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Old 10-07-2017, 09:57 AM   #7
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Usually, shit in = shit out. At this stage, since you are doing practice films basically, a reshoot is in order. "Fix it in post" is not something to rely on, even if you can... but in the case of bad sound, not much can be done anyway.
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Old 10-07-2017, 11:17 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BamFilms View Post
even though this is my first time ever doing any of this I guess I am shocked that on this forum I have yet to recieve any good feedback, whereas everywhere else they may give constructive critisism but also let me know for a first timer, thats not too shaby. I do appreciate all the feedback though and I do want to better myself in these areas.
Don't be discouraged. These are only 2 people but they are trying to help. You need to handle all kinds of feedback if you're going to be an artist who'll keep at it & get better. You're on a filmmaker forum of strangers who may be as hard on themselves as they are on others. Try to think that for people to take the time to respond is in itself a win.
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Old 10-07-2017, 11:29 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by buscando View Post
Don't be discouraged. These are only 2 people but they are trying to help. You need to handle all kinds of feedback if you're going to be an artist who'll keep at it & get better. You're on a filmmaker forum of strangers who may be as hard on themselves as they are on others. Try to think that for people to take the time to respond is in itself a win.
Im in no way upset. I do like the feedback. I just think a nice word of encouragement would tickle my fanny. Anyways, when we get to shooting more we are getting a dp and a sound guy. I believe that the script itself is great, and what we see with the story is family entertainment. There is a positive word in it as well. I will not give up. But as far as I am concerened for the first time of doing all these, Not only did I have fun, but I have learned quite a bit.
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Old 10-07-2017, 11:35 AM   #10
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If you can get really good sound the visuals are secondary. Many first time filmmakers get caught up in the latest camera talk, 4K talk, film-look, etc. (Not saying you are.) They forget about sound. But for a newbie, it's actually MORE important. The camera could be anything. When the sound "sounds" pro, the whole movie feels pro. Think Blair Witch, Clerks, Paranormal Activity, etc. My advice would be spend a lot of time getting pro sound. Of course you need good camera and editing too, but my point is, don't get caught up in that. Especially the tech angle. Good visuals, great sound. I put it on top.
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Old 10-07-2017, 05:35 PM   #11
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The good thing: a call to action. Although uncommon in teasers, from a marketing perspective it can be a good move if you plan to release more and more over time.
Another cool thing is you actually use what you have and make stuff. Too many people hide behind not having the latest equipment. Too learn, to play and to experiment you just need a camera and get out there making stuff. So you are having the right attitude when it comes to taking action.

Now I will nitpick about the content and it is not meant to be harsh, but as food for thought.
- I have no clue what this is about AND I don't feel teased or any curiosty at all. (Actually, as a fellow filmmaker I am curious, but that is because I'd like to know how you can make a better teaser :p But as a viewer: nope.)
You can tease people by revealing what it is about or you can just make them curious without doing that. You need either or both boxes (content/curious) checked.
- Most shots feel random. (The feeling of randomness often comes from lack of context.) From the 1 quote I can tell there is some kind of drama. Use that shot, add a reaction. The twoshot can work as well (comfort after yelling) and add some other quote.
- It is too slow and too many titles.

I would suggest:
-Skip the 'your teaser is here', because it adds nothing, but time.
- The first shot should be last.
- start with 0:28 from concepttrailer and with that voice-over
- 'You don't know what I'm going through!"
- Empty glass hits bar
- some shot with the beard that adds context
- Bar shot bold man arm on main character
- maybe here the chairs in the sunset, although it feels like not fitting the style
- end screen with your name and actors
- maybe "follow us"

Keep on going and you will get better and better

Trailers and teasers are hard: you want people to care, but you don't want to give it all away.
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Old 10-09-2017, 07:14 AM   #12
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It has been a fun learning experience, and with lots of feedback, I am reshooting again over the next week. Ill delete this thread and start a new one when i have the newest one edited. Thanks everyone. I love this, and even if just for fun, I do see an awesome movie here.
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Old 10-09-2017, 08:55 AM   #13
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I think deleting the thread is unnecessary. It's still part of your learning experience, and can serve as a learning experience for other newbies.

You rely on text way too much, and it doesn't create the tension that I think it was intended to create. It takes away from it. Walter mentioned skipping "Your teaser is here....." and I couldn't agree more. Same with "Are you curious now?????" First, show me, don't tell me. Second, grammar and syntax are keenly important when you're sending out a teaser or trailer. An ellipse is three periods (...). A question mark is singular (?). I know that exaggerations of those are typical in Internet lingo and in texting, but they're both terrible all the way around. If you're going to use text for your production, make sure it's correct. Anything else screams "amateur" and then, no, I won't be curious to see more.

In the "you have no idea what I'm going through" shot, the backlight makes the foreground fuzzy and improperly exposed, and everything has an orange shift from mixed lighting temps (sunlight coming in through the windows, tungsten lighting in the room). A couple of LED panels to key light, and shutting off the tungsten, could even out the lighting and exposure. Otherwise, reframe the shot to avoid the window as much as possible. The shot is also off-bubble. Learn to level your shots.

As for the second version: the first shot in the living room needs work. The camera angle is too high, looking down at the actors. I know we have a tendancy to see the world at our own viewing eye level, because that's what we see every day. Not great for the camera, though, or for the viewer. Try looking at the actors from their eye level, or even just below (shoulder level). In other words, that's the plane on which you place the lens. And that room needs some serious production design. The large, empty wall just makes the shot look cheap. Hang some pictures or posters. Put a bookcase back there. Do something to break up the void. The second shot, in the garage, is off-level and also suffers from a dull background.

And again, way too much text and overuse of exaggerated ellipses. And the text is all over the place (pick a font and stick with it). Alignment and placement are all over the place, too (center it vertically and horizontally). Cross-dissolve from white-text-on-black to video also should be avoided; fade out the text quickly, then bring in the video. And the use of flicker and motion path sticks out like a sore thumb. Those make no sense. Also, touting this as a "captivating story" is setting a bar for the viewer. The trailer isn't captivating, so just like touting actors and crew who have no name recognition, let the visuals pull the viewer in; don't try to sell it by telling the viewer how awesome it is.

The good thing is that you're out there doing stuff. Making a film - feature or short - is no small task. For something that is your very first time doing anything of this sort, don't be discouraged that there aren't many positive comments. The VHS of my first short film disappeared over 20 years ago, and I couldn't be more thankful for that.

Last edited by AcousticAl; 10-09-2017 at 09:14 AM. Reason: Fixin' the typos...
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Old 10-10-2017, 10:58 AM   #14
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The VHS of my first short film disappeared over 20 years ago, and I couldn't be more thankful for that.
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