For Aspiring Writers, Something Better Than a Root Canal

November 10, 2004

For Aspiring Writers, Something Better Than a Root Canal

By NICK MADIGAN

LOS ANGELES, Nov. 9 - Clutching crib notes, fighting butterflies and wearing the stricken look of cattle being led to slaughter, aspiring screenwriters from Ireland to Australia awaited their once-in-a-blue-moon opportunity to pitch The Great Idea to a battery of Hollywood producers, agents and managers.

"Think there's a little bit of anxiety in this room?" Robert D. Johnson, 35, a professed computer geek from Houston, said in a vain attempt at humor as he surveyed his jittery fellow aspirants. "Naaah. It's the first time I've ever done this. They'll figure out I'm a novice in no time."

Ushered into the so-called pitch mart last weekend at the Screenwriting Expo the third annual installment of a three-day conference dedicated to neophyte outsiders who hope to become Oscar-track insiders, the screenwriters began jabbering. After all, they had shelled out $60 for the three-day conference and $25 a pop for each pitch.

Trying to make himself heard above the din, Mr. Johnson sat before two executives from Braga Productions and, his mouth dry, rolled out one of the 19 ideas he had brought, this one for "The Scavenger," a sci-fi adventure in which the deep-space salvage ship Carpathia "is taken over by an artificial life form that reconstructs their garbage scow into a lethal war machine bound for Earth."

The Braga men passed, politely. "Why don't you fire another one at us?" asked Terry Matalas, a producer. "Pick your best."

Minutes later, the horde of screenwriters were peremptorily hustled out and another wave of hopefuls took their places, all of them deeply immersed in the hope that they would beat the overwhelming odds and land a deal to write a movie that ends up a blockbuster. Next stop, the Bentley dealership.The rewards can be astronomical, but so seldom are.

In the cappuccino joints of Los Angeles, nascent scribes peck forlornly at their laptop computers, wondering whether the next great high-concept idea will strike or forever elude them.

Struggling screenwriters still look with awe on the early career of Shane Black, who was 22 when he sold the screenplay for "Lethal Weapon," for $250,000, in 1986. He went on to receive $1.75 million, a record at the time, for his screenplay for "The Last Boy Scout" (1991), only to top himself by pulling in a stunning $4 million for writing "The Long Kiss Goodnight" (1996).

That almost never happens. Every year, about 50,000 screenplays are registered with the western division of the Writers Guild of America, with nonmembers paying $20 and members paying $10. Only a few hundred of those are bought or optioned by studios, producers and production companies - usually for relatively paltry sums. Of the screenplays that find a home, a mere fraction end up as finished motion pictures and then, more often than not, only after they have been eviscerated and rewritten by a succession of writers known as script doctors.

Nevertheless, an industry has blossomed around the notion that anyone with a good idea and the right skills can rack up a hit. There are innumerable variations of screenwriting software with advice on format, structure, character, plot and genre as well as "feedback services," run by writers who perhaps do not sell much of their own work but analyze the work of others and, for a price, usually around $175, offer suggestions for improvement. Screenwriting classes, courses and lectures abound.

At the conference sponsored by Creative Screenwriting magazine that ended Sunday, about 3,900 screenwriters and contenders of all stripes and talents crowded into meeting rooms at the Los Angeles Convention Center for more than 250 workshops and seminars. The hopefuls were determined to crack the code that elevates a few to mansions and fame.

The seminars had titles like "Evoking Emotion Through Style and Description," "Screenwriting Essentials: What to Do Until Spielberg Calls," "Killer Endings" and "Don't Be an Idiot Screenwriter; Do Your Research."

In another room, vendors hawked how-to books, software, coaching, seminars and Alaskan cruises. In a corner, a crew from the "Tonight" show taped writers pitching their ideas to the camera, for a show in December in which Jay Leno will doubtless draw mirth from their wacky premises.

Adding inspiration, successful screenwriters like Paul Attanasio, who wrote "Quiz Show" (1994) and "The Sum of All Fears" (2002), and the team of Scott Alexander and Larry Karaszewski, who turned out "Man on the Moon" (1999) and "The People vs. Larry Flynt" (1996), discussed their methods and answered questions.

Some of the advice was blunt.

"Directors are never to be trusted, remember that," William Goldman, who won Oscars for writing the screenplays for "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" (1969) and "All the President's Men" (1976), told a packed hall on Sunday.

Turning to his fellow panelist, Aaron Sorkin, who went from writing the scripts for "A Few Good Men" (1992) and "The American President" (1995) to creating the television series "The West Wing," Mr. Goldman sought to motivate by example.

"Aaron's had one success after another," he said. "This is not to flatter him, but to tell you that it can be done."

But for most, the hurdles will be unsurmountable. Earlier in the conference, during a contest in which writers were given an idea for a movie scene and 90 minutes to write it up, the results were wildly uneven.

"It's kind of all over the place," said Anna Siri, a screenwriter and one of the judges. "There are some that are really good and some that are just awful characters that have no conflict, no arc, who don't change from the beginning of the story to the end, lack of originality. The usual things."

Still, at the pitch mart, agents and producers said listening to cold pitches of screenplays was worth the trouble.

"I imagine we'll find four of five that we'll ask for," said Keith Dinielli, a creative executive with John Baldecchi Productions, which produced "The Mexican" (2001).

Marc Hernandez, an executive with Crescendo Entertainment Group, a literary management company, said he and his colleagues were always looking for new talent.

"I still feel there are plenty of people in Topeka or the heartland somewhere who are savant writers," he said. "They watch movies, they read scripts, but they just don't have access."

Last year, Mr. Hernandez said, he heard pitches from two people who showed promise. "We're working with them to develop other ideas," he said.

For the screenwriters, the process is like a visit to the dentist for a root canal.

"It's terrifying; it's sort of a man-eating business," said Jennifer Hellesto, 26, from San Diego, who was dangling the idea of her script "Speaking Through the Flowers," a drama about a woman who discovers that her new husband is the same man who murdered her parents and her twin sister when the girls were 10. It was not clear by the end if anyone wanted it.

"You can see within 30 seconds if it's a good idea," said Biana Kirkilevich, a creative executive at Energy Entertainment, a management production company. "Somehow the more nervous, the more animated they are, the more interesting the pitch is. They bring their passions and their emotions right there to the table, at least the good ones do."

Mr. Johnson, the Houston writer, who paid $25 each for a dozen five-minute pitching sessions, said by telephone on Tuesday that he came away with a valuable lesson.

"Keep it tight, keep it concise,'' he said. "A good, solid pitch can be done in 30 or 40 seconds. It's amazing that a career can be changed in one minute.''

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