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Old 04-15-2018, 11:31 AM   #1
Wade
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Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Sweden
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Question How to format this sequence using intercut?

Hi,

Currently writing a scene where we see two almost identical happenings experienced by two different people. We intercut between the two interpretations of what actually happened. Imagine two investigators showing up at a crime scene; imagine the mystery and suspense of what they're about to find. One scene though takes place in broad daylight, the other one in the middle of the night. There's no dialogue going on. (excuse the sloppy writing)

INT./EXT. POLICE CAR - NIGHT (DRIVING)

Rosanne makes a right, onto a driveway. She stops the car behind one of the two firetrucks also standing on the driveway along with several police cars and ambulances in front of a white cordoned off house.

She opens the driver door––

EXT. HOUSE - DAY

–– and Michael get's out of the car. He SLAMS the door shut and ducks under the barrier tapes as he approaches the crime scene on foot.

EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT

Rosanne shows her batch to one of the police officers guarding the site.

EXT. HOUSE - DAY

Michael crouches down next to a yellow body bag lying on the ground. He pulls the zipper and opens the bag.

MICHAEL'S POV –– looking at Rosanne's dead body.

EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT

ROSANNE'S POV –– looking at Michael's dead body.

Yadayadayada...

How do I make this flow better? Is there a way to use INTERCUT in this example to minimize the use of new sluglines?

//Thanks
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