Trying to keep the reader interested in first 3 pages.

Here are the first 3 pages of two scripts I wrote. I keep reading that it's important when pitching a script to get reader glued to it in the first 3 pages. Here are the first 3 of two scripts. They are two previous ones I've done, and not any of the new ones I mentioned before. Please pardon that some of the format got lost in conversion.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Zac4rVnIA_MwDdAUoUIx5PGZkuT9jdFtk8Sz1Mci5Mk/edit?hl=en_US

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xz-r6jLbtxILmci9vSnda1y6PR7ynvndyId8fcUJ0v8/edit?hl=en_US

Any advice, suggestions, and criticism will be appreciated. Thanks.