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Notes Sorry it took so long, but here it is. So like I said, I really like this futuristic story and I think it has a lot of potential. Notes/opinions: In the beginning, it gets confusing when we keep cutting to different things until I realize it's Stu watching TV through 3d glasses (pretty...

Hey, I just read your 22 pages. I really like it. I couldn't stop reading it. I do have a few suggestions for improvement. Story wise I can't give suggestions because I don't know where this is all heading towards. Also, I don't know if you'd consider a collaboration. I would love to help write...