After long last...

The uncut version of "Of Consequence" http://www.stevenrichards.com/images/smiley_creepy.gif

Sound has been (mainly) cleaned up in ADR, though you'll hear when it was not possible in the latter third.

It has about 3 minutes difference from the original cut, with a much more ambiguous opening.

It also has a fantastic new score, courtesy of Florian Linckus (http://www.FlorianLinckus.com), a very talented composer and musician.

Roughly 15mb streamable below, or straight download here (http://www.ZenWeasel.com/ifilm/consequence_02.wmv)
http://www.ZenWeasel.com/ifilm/consequence_02.wmv







Replies below this line ('til today, anyway) are reflective of an earlier and very different cut.

________________________________________







Here's my official entry for Round #3 :cool:

As usual, my sound bites. (Also had to chop far too much out to make it fit within 5 minutes)

Regardless, this is what we ended up with... baseball cap, line of dialogue in place... and a superb effort from everyone involved to beat the time-limit.

I hope you enjoy it... and I'll take the feedback I get from this to make the Director's Cut (out after this is over) just that much better.



Windows Version here (http://www.zenweasel.com/ifilm/conq_02.wmv)



Don't forget to watch all the other entries, before voting for me. :wait:

QuickTime version available here (http://www.zenweasel.com/ifilm/conq_02.mov) (Right-click & save)

The Players

Mikel Arvizu
David Ament
Melissa Paulo
Gene Ili

The Production

Flaviu Man
Vito Trabucco
Lenny Lenox

& Myron Kwong and his (very tasty) Lotus Garden Restaurant.

http://www.zenweasel.com/consequence/promo/poster_01.jpg

Nice short Zen. Good luck!

Chris

Thanks, Cibao :)

Your one will be giving me a run for my money, I know it. :cool:

Zen--just finished watching your short. My first thought is -- that bartender is going to have a mighty clean glass!!! But anyway, I loved the bartender in this...just cleaning his glass...the cutaways to him are great! I also really liked the lighting and certain camera angles. One particular shot I liked (though don't ask me why??) was the profile of the hero with the villan's face just behind him. The B&W effect with the light worked very well. The BW look, coupled with the subject matter, reminds me of the classic Twilight Zone. I thought the performace of the actress was the best of the bunch.

There is some definite noise in the audio, but that can be cleaned up with noise reduction pretty easily (from what I understand..never actually done it myself, mind you...). Overall, great job!

Amazing lighting... that was my favorite part of the whole thing.
Fav Shot: The framing on the "NOOOOO!"
The script was excellent, the shots looked great- I got a great laugh at the Infernal Contract
Great short! Loved a lot of the subtle effects!
I'll be watching these a few times and try and come up with some critiscm, but I love them all so much it's hard to be objective yet!!

Nice film Steve. Just one question What happens to baby when its not born and mom goes to H- E- Double... :huh:

Haha at Glass comment.

The Audio could use a little work, but other than that it was pretty well done! It had a nice beginning, middle, and end, and even a twist thrown in. Good job!

Thnak you for the comments so far...

...just taking Mr Fish's spoiler, for right now.

______

That's the rationale behind the title.

The issue you brought up was what everyone asked about, when I was passing the full (untitled) script around.

Take it for what you will... maybe even 3rd-party actions have some kind of consequence?

THAT was pretty darn good :). You're work just gets better every time! Congrats!

I loved all the subtle things there.

Did you use a steadycam on some of those shots? Or was it just zoom?

Wow Zen you are becoming the Master filmmaker! :bow: This is shot so well. Great use of the B&W and lighting. Your actors did a fine job as well. I see you had some "sex appeal" in this one with your actress. Nice move and she's just not a pretty face...she's a good actress! I hope you've kept her number. I think the title fits this movie very well.

Buttom line- http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/23/23_5_104.gif

I liked that alot Steve. It also reminded of a "twilight zone" episode as well. One of my favorite films of yours i've seen. :)

There was some great lighting in this one, kudos to both Zen and DirectorX. Also dament's performance was very good.

And yeah, apparently that bartender listened when his mother told him that cleanliness was next to godliness.

Poke

I'm thrilled so many of you have mentioned the great shots. That was the expert work of Flaviu (http://www.flaviuman.com), and his trusty XL1. Most of the shot-ideas were his, too. He has a very good eye, and also imagination on how things would look.

He was on rollerblades for most of the time, and getting quite a workout zipping all over the bar. Many times he would start off with a backwards spin to gain immediate momentum to propel himself backwards. (It was limited space to work in)

He only fell once, the whole night... and as he plummeted to the ground he had 4 pairs of hands immediately reaching out to catch... the camera. :lol:

_______

The lights were set up by Vito and Lenny of Other Side Cinema (http://www.othersidecinema.com). I'm sure they'll be delighted when I forward some of the comments about their fine work to them. They were a great help. :cool:

I could really see this flick easily converted into a feature. I dig the premise :pop: . Keep doing what you're doing, Zensteve. Nice work. :clap:

:cool:

Steve,
Hello its......... MMMMMIIIIGGGGUUUUEEEEELLLLLLLL, Wow Steve. That turned out really good, Man, I miss my long hair you made me cut of to play Miguel. ( lol ) I just want to say that its always fun working with you and Dave ( Brad Hawkins )

Great work Zen. It's one in the morning and I sure hope the loud laughing didn't bother the neighbors.

Loved the bartender too. I have spent many years in the food service industry and you do overhear some humdingers, the non reaction reaction is the only way to go.

My only question was the O'Henry "Gift of the Magi" similarity intentional? I have been considering trying to adapt and update some of his stories as I have always loved his story telling.

thanks Poke for the review. It was a lot of fun to do. I feel an actor is only as good as the writing, and Steve has got that nailed down. Thanks Steve.


Don't forget to watch and vote for HEALTH NUT:)

Hey Miguel (Mike), Great job in the movie man. You make the environment very easy for the other actors around you. Can't wait for us to work together on another project .

hehehe- just watched it again and noticed the foot and headphones on the ground when the girl hits the ground... hehe...

Honestly, this is really well done. Kudos to all involved.

noticed the foot and headphones on the ground

It's actually the tip of the boom-mic, not a foot. :blush:

Not to worry... I'll... err... fix it in post http://www.stevenrichards.com/images/smiley_ninja.gif

_______

Mikey, it's actually funny you ask that.

The answer is no... however, that's the exact same question someone asked me when I first started showing the script about. I've since read it, and have to agree that my story does indeed share a lot in common with it.

Weird. :weird:

Nice work, Steve.

As others have said, the shots are superb, camera work is first rate.

Interesting story to fit into 5 minutes, I know how hard it can be to fit a complete beginning-middle-ending in such a confined space but you did it very well.

The lighting is noteworthy. Lighting for color films is tricky at best, but to get the full range between black and white is even more difficult. Your lighting crew did a splendid job!

Hi Zensteve:

I loved it. In Screenwriting, they will throw in the trash if the first 10 pages doesn't grab you. Your short grabs you in and makes you wish it were longer.

I am here to learn and your short teaches how it is done.

Bravo,

Satire

Satan got a " buy 2 and get the 3rd Free "

Hello Mr. Hawkins ( Dave ) well thanks man. Its always fun working with you and Steve.
I just wish you were able to keep taking the acting classes with Steve and I. We miss you in the classes. I hope to work with you again on another project that Steve starts.

We seem to work well with each other. And besides I work with you alot. So make make its easy for me and the other actors too. I like to work with you and Steve because evrytime we all sit down for a table read. You as a actor have something new all the time and Steve above all, always brings in new Ideas along with his new stories.

I learn something new from you ( as a Actor ) everytime We sit down and start going over the storie,

And I always learn from Steve. I always learn one of the most Critical things a actor must know " Character "..... Know your Character. Steve always sits down and goes over the character. Making sure we know evrthing about the Character we are playing.

" Know your Character, Know everything about him / her, Know the likes and dislike of who you are playing, The WHO,WHAT,WHERE,WHY,WHEN,HOW, feelings , thoughts of the Character. Then you'll see, your not being an Actor "ACTING " the role out. You are and you'll become that PERSON / CHARACTER......that you are playing. Just add that texture of who """"" YOU ARE """""" and knowbody will ever beable to match it "

[I] Mikel Arvizu

Take care Dave and Steve, And we"ll see each other on the Next project

Yes, Mikel. Very important to "know" your character. :)

Not spilling the beans on the next project yet, mind you.

in my opinion one word sums up this piece - beautiful.

yet concurrently ugly and brutal.

i really liked this. as a bartender i can relate to the poor fella. oh, the stories we tenders could tell......

i found this piece enthralling. well acted, powerfully executed and above all
very charismatic.
well done to all involved (and bartenders the world over for keeping the worlds affairs secret)

I'm wondering if we should relate any of the film's plot with Zen's confidence that he'll win the comp...

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Poke

Apparently some people using Macs are having their browsers crash when coming to the thread.

Replaced the embedded video with a plain link to it... in case that was causing the problem. :cool:

Awesome short, Zen. It gets my vote!

Pros: Amazing cinematography and acting. Good script.

Cons: Audio (but you know that), could use some music, and I could tell that the movie had been cut way down. The end had sort of awkward timing. The wife died immediately, and then there was no time to let that death sink in or even be confirmed with a pulse or anything. Then the movie ended...that'll probably all be fixed in the director's cut...

...Again, awesome cinematography and give the players my props!

I'm glad you guys liked the cinematography, although I do remember certain individuals laughing when I was 'apparently' holding the camera backwads and upsidedown...

Hey, I really enjoyed the film. There was some good framing and the lighting was pretty good. Overall quality performances too, can't ask for much more.

I think the only thing that got me was when the girl's head hits the bar. It just didn't look too convincing, almost like her head was just laying there on the bar.

Also, I'm a fan of the tracking shot, but to me it seemed the camera was too far away from the actors as they entered for it to be very effective. Rollerblades are probably not the best choice when filming in such a tight area either. A chair on rollers or simply wearing tennis shoes and operating the camera with a steady hand probably would have sufficed. I've gotten some incredibly smooth shots using both methods.

But besides that, I'd like to see it once the audio's cleaned up, it was really well done.

Congrats!

Loy:

Yes, I've never done a shot like that before. It's going to look pretty similar in the final version... we did a few takes, but all from the same angles as shown so I'm not sure how much more realistic I can make it. I think the most I can do is play with the timing on it a bit. (and add a better sound-effect than an orange being dropped onto the floor) :lol:

It's interesting you mention the "far away". We tried that intentionally to give the illusion that the bar was bigger than it really was. Start with the far away look, then redo it closer up (and from different angle)... overlap the footage. I think it was effective in adding some imaginary distance from the door to the bar-counter. Did it look a little awkward? Maybe it does. I'll examine it again when I get down to re-editing it.

_______

Logan:

Thanks for the vote. :)

The end of the re-edit will definitely have some of the elements you mentioned. There's actually a decent amount of straight material to place in, as well as some sneakier things...

Good call on needing music, too. I'll be looking for a symphonic composer when this is done... if you watched HailKing's or Bophe's entry, you can easily see how much more a good score can add.

_______

Zoolio:

Thanks for the kind comments! :)

_______

Satire:

I'm glad you enjoyed the story so much.

The boards here are really a great place to learn so many aspects of what goes into a film... and like you, I look to learn more about the craft every day here. I'm no teacher; I just apply what I have picked up on the boards from the many people here who share their knowledge.

You should have a crack at this competition the next time it rolls around! It's fun, it's hands-on experience... and that's the best type of learning one can ever hope for.

_______

Spaulovich:

I was exceptionally lucky to have Lenny & Vito there to do the lighting. They ended up on that, after my original two crew members failed to show up... talk about a blessing in disguise!

_______

Thank you for all the comments so far, people.

Don't forget to cast a vote at some point for your favourite entry (be sure to watch them all first... a lot of people have put a lot of time, energy and effort into each entry... it would be a shame to miss another peer's work)

:P

It's interesting you mention the "far away". We tried that intentionally to give the illusion that the bar was bigger than it really was. Start with the far away look, then redo it closer up (and from different angle)... overlap the footage. I think it was effective in adding some imaginary distance from the door to the bar-counter. Did it look a little awkward? Maybe it does. I'll examine it again when I get down to re-editing it.

I think that strategy worked well. The only far away shot that I felt should have been closer was the "Miguelllll!" line by dament. I realize the point of the shot was the appearance of the ground smoke, so I think that was a filmmaker's decision that should stay. I'm just saying that was the only one I noticed as being something i would have done differently.

Poke

if you watched HailKing's or Bophe's entry, you can easily see how much more a good score can add.


Bophe had an AMAZING song! and Hail's had such a moving piece!
But Sandwich had GONGS! C'mon!

Ok... ok... ok... it was a looping program! But still! Took a darn long time to get those tracks synched and made!

Ok... ok... ok... It took very little time... but it took a long time to FIND the free loops...

Ok... ok... ok... They were Fruit Loops.

Ok- I'm an idiot. But seriously Zen, I'd love to see "Of C." with a score! Go the distance!

I meant no slight, good Spatula. :)

Your track is very impressive too... I limited what I mentioned to the tunes that qualify for the Score Prize, though. (I hope I didn't miss any)

Using loops to generate tracks still takes a great deal of skill, indeed. If it makes you feel any better, I can't even do that do that... for my opening theme, I told SmartSound to auto-magically generate a classical piece lasting 40 seconds... that's about the limit of my musicianship. :lol:

Making a score out of Fruit Loops is no easy task.

that's about the limit of my musicianship. :lol:

I see it ranks up there with your knowledge of the dictionary.

Poke

I told SmartSound to auto-magically generate a classical piece lasting 40 seconds...

Must.. get... that... program...

Making a score out of Fruit Loops is no easy task.

I threw in a few Lucky Charms and it all worked out in the end. :)

that's about the limit of my musicianship.


I see it ranks up there with your knowledge of the dictionary.

I don't get it :no:

musicianship

n : artistry in performing music

Am I missing something?

Dictionary. com is wonderful!!
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=musicianship

LOL

It seems that it is I who has not a grasp of the English language! Thank you Texas Education System!

Poke

Must.. get... that... program...

It can be handy... but it gets old really fast. You'll be able to pick out the SmartSound songs in almost any locally-made tv commercial, too. Very distracting. Useful in a pinch, though.

I got mine basically free. A video-card I bought a while back came bundled with Pinnacle Studio 7... and Studio 7 comes with basic SmartSound on it. The only time I load Studio 7 is if I need to use SmartSound. :lol:

I might try to acquire the program (cheaply)... could come in handy, as I'm trying to build up some skills and start getting some freelance work... and even if it's a tad cheesy, the ease of it would be supremo neato!

Just finished watching...

The first thing I didn't like was the picture of Miguel as a Marine... Maybe I'm nitpicking here but Marines didn't wear camo tshirts back then... He wouldn't be saluting in that kind of a picture either...

20 years in the Navy gives me that inside information...

I felt the dialogue started off somewhat on the nose but toward the end I thought it got much better...

Great omnipresent bartender... Without those shots of him, I don't think I would have liked it as much. I definitely got the impression that he's not only heard it all... But he's seen it all too... Just another day at the bar... Good stuff.

Your actress was really good.

The guy playing Miguel was pretty good overall but at the end after she dies and he screams her name... Just felt like he was copying a movie... Didn't seem natural. We already know about the sound but I didn't think it detracted that much from the story but wow... Clean it up and it might be even more compelling... I also immediately thought of O'Henry in a bass ackwards kinda way.

Good camera work...

Good editing.

I thought the book prop looked a little forced...

Good job Zen...

filmy

Thanks, Mr Filmy :)

I know what you mean about the Marine outfit. I had the whole cast come by for a photoshoot on a Sunday for various stills I wanted. Mikel showed up early to come with me to the local costume rental place to get a really neat outfit... damn my luck if the shop is closed on Sundays! I had to make do with what we could rustle up at WalMart in 20 minutes. I know it looks really out of place... so out of place that I'll be asking Mikel to come by again, and we'll do it right. http://www.stevenrichards.com/images/smiley_patriot.gif

I agree with the book-part. With the re-edit, I hope I can make it look a little better... and I think it will, with the new material added.

There's been so much great feedback in this thread, that I am confident the final cut will be outstanding.

IndieTalk rocks! http://www.stevenrichards.com/images/smiley_rock.gif

:clap: love the black and white :pop: very good one.

The original post (http://www.indietalk.com/showthread.php?t=6574) has been updated with a new cut. :cool:

Placing it here, too... may as well :)

http://www.ZenWeasel.com/ifilm/consequence_02.wmv

No fixing Aileen's bad stretch, though. :(

Any of you audio-savvy peeps think you'd be up for inverting that, before I spin out some final DVDs?

Also, a massive thanks to Florian Linckus (http://www.FlorianLinckus.com) for the smashing new original score. He sure knows his music. :)

Congrats, Zen! Much improved with new score and cleaner audio!!!

Thanks, John. :)

The new score made a world of difference, both in quality and atmosphere.

I'm glad you liked it. :cool:

Wow- with the new cuts and scoring it's 500x better! Love the beginning exterior by the road. I'm floored. Too bad you're going to loose ITOOFC4. That's right. I said it.
What did you film this on by the way?

Thanks, Spat :)

It was filmed on Flaviu Man (http://www.FlaviuMan.com)'s XL1 PAL (25fps)

Oh... and there is just no way I am going to lose ITOOFC #4. Get ready for defeat! http://www.stevenrichards.com/images/smiley_ninja.gif

Hey Steve, really liked the new cut :) Slightly melodramatic acting in areas but overall it sucked me in.

very fun...like the congressman contract :)

the only thing that caught me here visually was the steady shots weren't quite rock solid. You should be able to run that through an image stabilizer to lock them down though, like the shots of the bartender, they waver just slightly.

And I got the impression (squishy) that it was supposed to be 16x9? was my window just displaying it incorrectly at 4x3?

was supposed to be 16x9? was my window just displaying it incorrectly at 4x3?

You know... you're right! :blush:

I'll re-compress again tonight. (I made some 4:3 copies to play on a really old tv, and forgot to switch back)

Slightly melodramatic acting in areas

Just the way I like it. http://www.stevenrichards.com/images/smiley_creepy.gif

You may recognise a few faces from this in my next film... I'm going to try and show their versatility with something really different. :cool:

I'm glad you like the score at all... thanks for that,

see you on ITC#4 ;)

interesting story. but: horrible acting, and you could see the dry ice the the bottom of the glass. but it had some good dialogue.

Thanks Deliman :cool:

I've since heard that I should have added some milk to the water & dry-ice, to cloudy up the drink and hide the dry-ice.

:)

....love the lighting, alot of b&w films sometimes tend to be 'muddy' (if that's the right word for it). Beautiful, clear, wonderfully lit. and not a bad story. I liked the outside shot with all the cars in the background. Very nice, Zen!

--spinner :cool:

Nice short Steve. good editing and sound. Reminds me of a twilight episode. My only issue was I kept expecting the classic 80s song "Come on Eileen" to start playing :(

:D

I liked that.. It was really entertaining... the only thing that was distracting was the music seemed a bit too loud... Great music by the way.. but just seemed to be too loud.. but maybe that was just my computer.

but hey.. I really liked that...... really.

Bartender rocked, satan's contract for congressmen rocked. But I was confused when el diablo left with Miguel at the end though, is Miguel dead now too? They keep getting better. Good job. Look forward to your next one.

the music seemed a bit too loud

A few other people have mentioned that, too. I think I'll have to tone it down some more. Glad you liked it :)

is Miguel dead now too?

That's the implication, as the deal was he'd be able to live for as long as his wife is alive.

Look forward to your next one.

Oh... I dunno. It's up right now in the ITOOFC #4 entries... but it's basically incomplete, and looks like ass. Those deadlines get me every time. :lol:

Maybe check it out in 3 - 4 weeks. :cool: