Not bad, overall.
If you've followed us here on IndieTalk for a while you'll know that I can be a harsh critic, and will understate praise, so here goes...
I personally found it a bit "synthy" in places. That's probably because it's too perfectly in tune. Real orchestras get out of tune depending upon the dynamics and the length of the piece being played. String sections sit in front of the brass and are "deafened" by them, so as the performance goes on they will play a little sharper as the performance continues so they can hear themselves better. A great example is a continuous live performance of Beethovens 9th Symphony because it is so long; string sections play as much as 10 to 18 cents higher by the end of the symphony. Brass instruments, on the other hand, go a little flat as they heat up and expand, but only 1 or 2 cents. You may also want to add very minor tempo fluctuations as you change from section to section; musicians tend to rush as they come up to the "chorus" for example.
The reverb was a touch dense so the mix got a little muddy in spots.
Just personal preference, but I thought that the arrangement could have been a little more detailed.
Again personal preference, but I like more melodic scores; however, without a picture reference it's tough to judge the intent of your piece.
You'll need more than one track to attract clients, at least half a dozen pieces showing different moods and styles.
Like I said, though, it's not bad at all.
