I wasn't that captivated by what was going on. I thought the dialog, the acting, and the action was pretty lackluster, which immediately turned my attention to the ultra-low production value.
One thing you want to do, in an uber-low budget film, is to have a good story and good acting. If the story and acting is awesome, the production value will be forgotten, and the viewer will be lost in the moments...if however the script is bad and the acting is bad, the viewer will look for things to focus on, and the lack of quality camera work, lighting and sound will come to the foreground.
One thing I recommend to you is SOUND. Right now it's all over the place, and obviously not recorded by a boom mic...sound does so much for the audience, in terms of capturing their attention, and connecting them with the story and characters.
I would also be more aware of how you light a scene...I didn't mind the first few shots in the bedroom...but as soon as you stepped outside, all acceptable lighting potential was lost.
I think a lot of the shots (random hand-helds being artistic) were pretty weak...but I liked the fact that you're trying to be creative...unfortunately, these shots are messy, and really doesn't work or help the story along.
The editing wasn't fantastic either, but I think you have other fish to fry first.
Great start. Good practice. Make another one.
Remember, in terms of acting...there is a fine line between 'realistic' and boring. Good actors learn to walk that tight rope...inexperienced actors tend to be bland and boring in an attempt to be 'real.' You have to maintain *energy* at the same time you're being 'real.'
Take care.
